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Perfect couples do not exist, although some movies or gossip magazines try to convince us that they do. And the confirmation is in the number of divorces and separations that occur every day. Coexistence is tough, and requires the commitment and sincere dedication of each of the members to be able to cope with crises and enjoy moments of harmony.
Job stress, illness, and parenting often make the "normal" conditions of family life even more difficult. We can detect 10 common reasons for conflict between parents. Knowing them will help you pay attention to which one (s) most affect your partner and try to establish strategies to keep them under control.
1. Communication: It is one of the basic conflicts of couples. Believing that one thinks or did something and not talk about it, is then when negative thoughts are generated by one of the members regarding the other. He doesn't speak to me, he doesn't understand me, we don't have time to talk. Of course, the personalities are usually not the same and it is common for one to be more expressive than the other, but we must make an effort to put the issues on the table and create spaces for sincere communication to happen.
2. Parenting: Boys ask, demand, society also does it and it is not easy to agree, but contradictory messages should not be given. Weigh the pros and cons of each decision and know that there is no single way to do things.
3. Sexuality: From disagreements to infidelities, conflicts related to sexuality are commonplace. You cannot always be in tune, one may have more desires than the other, but the key is to give in each one from time to time.
4. Housework: Current cultural models still prioritize the role of women as housewives, even though they also work outside the home. However, you have to establish roles and understand that the home belongs to both. Getting kids to do tasks too makes the effort a little more even.
5. The routines: We all need some excitement in our lives. Getting up, going to work, cooking, going to bed, ends up overwhelming anyone. How about an outdoor picnic? A cooking class together?
6. The absence of projects: Either the absence of common projects or the absence of individual projects that make life empty and unmotivated.
7. Work: The work of the other can generate jealousy, either because of the amount of hours dedicated, because of the friendships that are generated with colleagues.
8. Money management: There are more spendthrift people, others more thrifty. In cases where natural management is different, clear rules should be defined.
9. Friends and other links: Not liking one another's friend may prevent meetings together, but it shouldn't prevent the other from seeing that person individually.
10. Family of origin: Nobody likes to be spoken against by their parents, brothers, uncles, grandparents. It is common for one to want to visit parents and another not, to want to invite them home, etc.
As we said at the beginning, achieving a healthy survival requires true love, not selfish, giving in, trusting, and not always doing what one wants, but what the other needs.
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